Written from a Cafe 1040 Student 

‘Just shut your eyes. He can’t actually see you. Turn around. You don't have to keep wasting your time. Walk away. There’s no one stopping you. What difference does it really make if I choose not to follow Him?’

These are some of the exact thoughts that have been running through my head the past few weeks. 

I have felt the tension between the weight of the world and its glorious appeal and the eternal impact of God and His light. How could one, for even an instant, consider choosing a life that neglects the beauty of His riches? Yet, our sinful hearts, full of rebellion and darkness, constantly turn us away from our Maker.

The fear, the doubt, the nasty desires that fester deep within – they tell me that I am not good enough for my Father. They tell me that I am utterly and completely alone. Instead of acknowledging my sinful state and that I need help, I look to Him and think, ‘How could you let me feel this way? How could you allow that to happen? Why aren't you helping me?’

But then…

In His quietness and mercy, He silences my doubts. In His still whisper, He reminds me that He in fact is God, that He is my creator, and that I belong to Him. I am the one, the human, that chose to rebel against Him. His ways are higher. His thoughts are higher. Who am I to question his authority? 

As I have been thinking and processing all of these things, my team has had some classes about sharing the gospel. We have reviewed the basics and learned the most effective ways of sharing the Good News with our local friends. Though the classes are to help us build confidence in sharing with others what we believe, they have served as such a sweet reminder to my heart as to the weight of what Jesus Christ did for me.

It’s always good to have a refresher – how we are so deserving of death, yet our loving Father saves us from that darkness through his perfect Son – right??.

These small reminders have spoken to my heart and reminded me of why I am here and God’s purpose for my life as a Christ-follower.